Seeing as it’s been exactly an entire semester since I’ve last blogged (literally, my previous post was about surviving Finals in December), I figure Finals Week is the perfect time to jump back into the blogosphere. For those of my honorary readers (I know there are soooo many of you) who have been worried sick about me because I have not taken the time to update on here, never fear, I have not died. Just in case I don’t promote Her Campus Clemson enough on my Facebook and Twitter, this is the part of my blog where I inform you all that I do, in fact, have a life. I don’t have much of a life, but I do have one, I promise.

Nevertheless, today’s blog post was inspired by my immense confusion and frustration with mundane things that have distracted me from studying for my one final exam. Well, that, and my dear friend Hayley‘s uncanny ability to maintain her blogging even though she’s graduating, have inspired me to step back up to the plate of expressing my thoughts and hoping someone, somewhere, finds me even remotely interesting. Enjoy.

Things I am Currently Flustered With:

Jessica Simpson & Her Child
Before I say anything, let me clarify that I am actually a huge fan of Jessica Simpson if not only because of her spectacular shoe line. However, there are so many questions swirling my brain pertaining to this topic. The poor woman looked like she weighed as much as

a small baby elephant. How did she carry on a normal life, let alone walk at all? There are even pictures of her walking in her 3rd trimester in heels. Yes, heels. WHY?! HOW?! It just doesn’t seem plausible. So, yes, naturally, upon hearing news of J.Simp’s birth, I was expecting to hear the announcement of not one, but two children. Honestly, I wouldn’t have been surprised if  a small African village was burn unto Jessica. In addition to being flustered as to Jessica Simpson’s size, I was completely blindsided by the announcement of the child’s name: Maxwell Drew Johnson. Don’t get me wrong, it’s actually a perfectly normal baby name, especially coming from Hollywood. The only problem is, the child is a girl. I just can’t quite wrap my head around this one. I guess celebrity baby names were just becoming so ridiculous that Jessica didn’t think she could think of something crazy enough, so she just did a complete 180° and identified her child with the opposite sex. Totally normal. Jessica, I was really holding out for you. Now, I’m just incredibly confused.

The Clemson Chipotle & Its Lack of Being Open
If you know me at all, you know that I will do anything and everything for Chipotle. Some say that my obsession is something I should be embarrassed about, some say that I don’t know what I’m talking about and Moe’s is better (joke of the day), and some are intimidated by such strong feelings for a burrito. Upon hearing news that Clemson was given the honor to receive a Chipotle Mexican Grill, it’s safe to say that I was on another planet. No longer would I have to endure the lackluster burritos from Moe’s; no longer would I have to drive 45 minutes to Greenville to satisfy my craving; no longer would I be without my sacred Chipotle. Month after month, I waited patiently for the construction to come to an end, for there to be a grand opening, of which I would be the first in line, and nothing happened. Unsatisfied with the results, I took to Twitter and communicated with Chipotle HQ only to found out that the Clemson, SC location would be opening right around the first week of May. Huzzah! My calendars were marked, and my countdown began. It was only until recently that I decided to correspond with Chipotle HQ, again via Twitter, to inquire about the status of the glorious food chain. To my dismay and utter distraught, I was informed that the Clemson Chipotle was not expected to open its doors until late May, early June. I was filled with immense sadness and confusion, both of which could only be satisfied by a burrito bowl, and have since attempted to carry on my day-to-day activities without being overcome with too much a melancholy feeling.

The Activities of Library Dwellers During Finals Week
Seeing as I am writing this blog post instead of creating a study guide for my final exam on Friday, yes, I am currently located in Cooper Library. A frequent dweller of this six-story study nook, I believe myself to be an expert on the appropriate behavior and etiquette of those that choose to come to Cooper to get their work done. However, apparently, some people believe that  the proper library etiquette and behavior are thrown out the window during Finals Week, and that they are free to behave like savages. This, my friends, is false. The following is a list of things that are, in fact, still unacceptable during Finals Week:

1. Discussing mundane details of your life at an octave higher than the respectable ‘library voice’. No, young freshman, I do not care to hear about your all-nighter and how you managed to accomplish nothing but Facebook stalk (amateur), and I especially don’t want to hear you discuss this event so loudly that I cannot hear myself think.
2. Listening to your music so loudly that I can sing along with you. I beg your pardon, but that’s what my own headphones are for. It might be hard for you to believe, but listening to Nicki Minaj via your headphones turned all the way up is actually intrusive to my learning, and most likely intrusive to your learning, as well.
3. Sitting in a spot with immediate access to a plug and not using your computer. Have you no manners? Or are you just an idiot? Most likely, you are both, and it is quite possible that I will stare at you until you feel uncomfortable (as you should) and remove yourself from the premises.
4. Blatantly Facebooking for over half an hour whilst other people need the computer/plug. I can see you. No, really, I am watching you Facebook stalk. And doing this before it’s even dark outside? Give me a break. Everyone knows the only acceptable time to Facebook stalk in the library is once the sun has gone down, thus allowing your lack of focus to be somewhat excusable.
5. Even existing in the library if you are not a Clemson student. I’m sorry, but the creepy locals that meander in Cooper and are, more often than not, seated at the library computers have got to go. Not only are you not conducive to my learning environment, you’re just flat out annoying. Leave your marital problems, inexcusable loudness,  and tending to your Farmville crops outside of my university library.

I’ve become too bothered with the nearby library-dweller who just needs to listen to his music at full capacity (on his airplane headphones, I might add) that I need to bring my flustered thoughts to an end. Enjoy, and if you have any spare time in your life this week, why, yes, I would love a Chipotle burrito bowl! Thanks for asking!